Just a few things

When I Grow Up

So, the New Jersey Devils are heading to the Stanley Cup Finals.  I am only peripherally into hockey, to be honest, and I tend to support the Buffalo Sabres.  My best friend is responsible for getting me (peripherally) into hockey, and he’s a die-hard Sabres fan, so I sorta started out rooting for them before I cared about the sport.  Either way, I’m excited that something went well for New Jersey, ‘cause even though it sucks and I hate it it is my home.  I’m also reminded of when I was 5 years old and watched the Devils win the Stanley Cup, sweeping the Detroit Red Wings, 40. 

Game 4 was the first time I had ever seen hockey EVER. I was cold and wrapped up in a towel on my Uncle Jeff’s couch, with a couple of my older teenage cousins and their friends watching the game.  I thought it was the coolest thing, and the next day I proudly told my next door neighbor (who I firmly believed was my best friend—turns out he was a brat and a bully, but I looked up to him anyway) that when I grew up, I wanted to play hockey for the New Jersey Devils. Nevermind I had never even touched a hockey stick, and could hardly roller blade, much less ice skate; I wanted to be an NHL Hockey Player.

I gave up the idea shortly after the other little boy told me that I would have to give my soul to the devil if I wanted to do that—that every single player on the team was going to hell and was a living devil.

So I decided I’d be a movie star instead.

That idea stuck for a while, though I thought maybe I’d do stage acting / musical theater first. Then I was gonna be a rock star who played skapunk, then a lawyer who was gonna moonlight as a hardcore frontman, then just a lawyer, and now I don’t really have any idea what I want to do—what I want to be when I grow up.  However, I still feel like I know where I want to go.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that, with the idea of graduation and peoples’ dreams on my mind, I’ve also been thinking about what MY dreams are.  And while I’m pretty sure I still have no idea WHAT I will be (if not a superhero who happens to find world peace), but I think I have a better idea of WHO I want to be. My dreams have changed a bunch, and I think by and large they still are. Though each time I think I find it I KNOW that it is my dream, until I know it isn’t. And I guess that’s how we find what our dream is—by finding out what it isn’t?

IDK.

  1. miafermindoza said: True doe
  2. dffiv posted this